“I Don’t Have Time to Relax”: Therapy Hacks for the Time-Starved Woman

One of the most common things I hear from clients, especially women, is, “I don’t have time to

relax.” Between work, family, social obligations, and the never-ending mental load, it can feel

impossible to carve out a few moments just for yourself. Even the idea of scheduling self-care

can start to feel like yet another item on an already overwhelming to-do list. But here’s the thing:

relaxation and emotional regulation don’t always require hours of meditation or a weekend

retreat. Sometimes, it’s about finding small, effective hacks to reset your nervous system in the

time you already have. 

I have a good friend who swears by the most unconventional self-care hack I’ve ever heard—he

drinks an espresso and then takes a 10-minute power nap, waking up just as the caffeine kicks in,

feeling rested and energized. Yes, you heard that right. And that’s the beauty of self-care—you

need to figure out what works for you, even if it’s not a Pinterest-perfect routine or a one-size-

fits-all solution.

The truth is, we all need moments of calm—not just for our mental health, but for our physical

well-being, too. Chronic stress wears down the nervous system. It impacts our sleep, affects our

mood, our ability to self-regulate, impacts our interpersonal relationships, and over time, can

even contribute to health problems. But when you’re constantly carrying the mental load, taking

time to relax can feel like a privilege you simply don’t have. And with social media bombarding

us with perfectly curated images of what “self-care” looks like, the pressure can make us feel

like we’re failing if we’re not on a yoga mat at sunset. Instead of “finding time” to relax, what if

we incorporate quick, restorative practices into the busy moments of our day? These simple

therapy hacks can help you reset without needing to overhaul your schedule. 

1) Alternate Nostril Breathing 

During a recent EMDR training, I learned a simple but incredibly effective tool: alternate nostril

breathing, specifically left nostril breathing. This technique stimulates the parasympathetic

nervous system—the part of the body responsible for relaxation and calm. It can be done in just a

few minutes and works wonders to quickly soothe stress.

Here’s how to practice left nostril breathing:

• Sit comfortably and close your right nostril with your thumb.

• Slowly inhale through your left nostril.

• Hold your breath, then exhale slowly through the left nostril.

• Repeat this for 1–3 minutes.

This simple act of closing off one nostril can bring balance to your nervous system, lowering

your heart rate and calming your mind. It’s a quick and accessible way to reset in stressful

moments.

2) 60 Second Reset

We often think relaxation needs to be a lengthy process, but sometimes all you need is a minute.

The 60-second reset is a quick grounding exercise you can do anywhere.

• Close your eyes (if you can).

• Inhale deeply for four seconds, hold for four, and then exhale for six.

• Focus on the sensation of your breath and let the tension melt away.

In just one minute, this practice similarly activates the body’s parasympathetic response, helping

to clear the mental clutter and release the physical tension that builds up throughout the day.

3) Body Scan: Releasing Tension in Real-Time

One of the most effective ways to stay aware and connected to yourself during hectic days is

through a body scan. This practice helps bring awareness to the physical sensations in your body,

allowing you to consciously release tension that builds up throughout the day.

• Start by focusing on your feet and slowly move your attention upward, scanning your

legs, hips, back, shoulders, neck, and finishing with our face and head.

• As you scan, notice areas of tightness or discomfort, and which each exhale,

consciously release that tension.

The more you practice scanning and releasing, the more aware you’ll become of your body’s

stress signals, helping you manage tension before it builds up.

4) Distinguishing Between Proprioceptive and Interoceptive Cues

One powerful tool for stress management is learning to differentiate between proprioceptive

cues (which tell us about our body’s position in space) and interoceptive cues (which give us

information about our internal state). By distinguishing between these, we can understand

whether our discomfort is coming from an external or internal source, helping us better

understand what we need.

• Proprioceptive cues come from your body’s interaction with the environment. For

example, feeling off-balance or slouching.

• Interoceptive cues are internal sensations, like hunger, thirst, or anxiety.

When you can identify whether your tension is coming from the outside world or from within,

you’ll have a clearer sense of whether you need to adjust your internal or external environment.

This awareness helps you make more targeted self-care decisions throughout your day.

5) Cross Crawl: Bilateral Movement

Another quick and effective tool is the cross crawl, a bilateral movement exercise where you

cross the midline of your body to engage both sides of your brain. This is particularly helpful

when you’re feeling scattered or overwhelmed, as it helps with brain-body integration.

• Stand up and lift your right knee while touching it with your left hand.

• Alternate sides, lifting your left knee and touching it with your right hand.

• Continue this for 1–3 minutes.

This simple movement helps regulate your nervous system and brings a sense of balance back

to your body and mind.

By incorporating these five therapy hacks into your day, you can crate moments of calm and

balance without needing to set aside large blocks of time in your day. Self-care doesn’t have to

be elaborate or time-consuming—it just has to work for you.

Feel free to try these techniques and explore what works best for you. If you’d like a more

personalized approach, I invite you to book a consultation to discuss strategies tailored to your

unique routine and needs.